Archive for the ‘Teacher Barbies’ Category

Quote of the Day: Kids Voting Edition

Monday, November 5th, 2012

*This story is not embellished. These 2nd graders are really this hilarious. oh yeah, and smart.

 

2nd Grade Boy: Ms. Hendon, who are you voting for?

Me: Well, I already voted and I am keeping that information private.

2nd Grade Girl: My mom told me there are three things you don’t talk about. Religion, how old somebody is, and who you voted for.

Me: (OMG)

2nd Grade Boy:  I’m voting for Nick Romney. He is all about family.

Me: And you think President Obama is not all about family? He does have 2 daughters and a wife .

2nd Grade Boy: Yeah, but Obama made all those promises. Promises, promises, promises.

Me: Yes, that is what politicians do. They make lots of promises.

 

Happy Election Day!

What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You…Blonder?

Wednesday, September 12th, 2012

It’s time for another haircut.

Do I go Mad Men Blonde this time?

If today is any indication of how the rest of my Wednesdays will go, I am going to need to cover more grey soon. Gray or grey? Tomato, Tomato. Potato, Potato.   Please tell me when you read that you heard the two different pronunciations in your mind.

Yesterday an eight year old  tried to fix me up with her grandpa. She said he was single, if I was into old men with ponytails.

Last week while trying to sit in a circle on the floor, I said something about how it’s difficult to sit like this when you get older. A student replied, “You’re not old, you look 35.”  Sigh.   No dear, I’m just 30.

The Shoe Club = Shoe Heaven

Saturday, August 18th, 2012

Today I PR’d! Not that this is difficult when your run at a turtle’s pace.

 

We did it NOBO2! We ran through the hottest summer in history!

I enjoyed the Sunrise 5K at the Alamo Heights Pool. It was the most crowded race I’ve done in awhile. I unfortunately started out too far in the front of the pack with the rabbits, and this killed me in my time by the last mile…so tired!  Farm Boy was waiting for me at the last 300 meters and actually ran alongside me, that is until I waved him off cause I thought I needed all the air I could get. I was so HOT! My personal trainer ran the race as well, and waited to “cheer” me on at the end.

Even Instagram can’t hide my tired eyes! lol This is Lauren my trainer. If you don’t know me, she is obviously the fitter one. :)

Typically when we workout she is all sweet and positive. Today she was standing about 100 meters from the finish line and she gave me the meanest “DON’T SLOW DOWN” yell I’ve ever heard. It worked. I hauled it in at 35 mins and 45 seconds. That is an 11:31 min mile pace. Not bad. My new turtle name is Trot. Trot the Tortoise or Hot to Trot?

After running the Sunrise 5K this morning, I was starving…for NEW SHOES!

I needed to replenish all those "nutrients" I lost while running. ;)

Luckily, this is tax-free weekend in Texas. This can only mean one thing.

Every store is packed and likely out of your size.

Unless you are smart like me, and you go to the local stores like The Shoe Club in the Quarry Market area (across from the Quarry).

I left with THREE pairs of fabulousness.

Black and Gold-My old High School Colors!

Because sometimes you need Silver

 

I’m in love my new ballet flats. I could probably buy a pair in every color if I won the lottery. They are buttery soft, with enough flexibility to wear comfortably. I will have to see if they pass the teacher death stand test.

The third pair is the most fabulous, but I’m saving them for after Labor Day.  I’ll give you a hint.

They are from the fall TOMS collection.

Did you do any Back to School Shopping this weekend?

 

Why I Don’t Teach Middle School

Tuesday, June 19th, 2012

I’ve been teaching a PSAT study camp at the high school campus this week for an interesting group of soon-to-be 8th graders.

Let’s just say 8th graders are not interested in English Grammar in the middle of June.  Wait a minute, I’M not interested in grammar during June (or any other month…have you read this blog!?).

Here is what I’ve noticed so far about 8th graders:

They are just as rowdy as 4th graders, but BIGGER.

 

They are OBSESSED with their cell phones! PUT THAT DAMN PHONE AWAY!

They still write like 4th graders…or worse.

They get excited over gel pens. I’m not kidding. Like FIGHTING over colorful gel pens. :) My kind of kids!

They are obsessed with their afros. At least 3 times a day someone is distracting the group by talking about their hair. It typically begins with a little boy lamenting the day that he shaved his. Then the others start discussing their current hair status. Fascinating.

Look! It’s little Michael! ABC, Easy as 1,2,3

Lastly, the high school I am working at has two competing mascots apparently….

   VS   

ICK!!!!!!!!!

There is a giant cockroach that hangs out on the wall outside my classroom, and a little field mouse when running through the main hallway this morning.

I might need a sub if I see these lil friends tomorrow!

Have you ever worked somewhere with a “mascot” problem? lol

 

Field Trip Funnies

Friday, April 6th, 2012

HELLO STRANGERS

I’ve been going to bed at like 6 o’clock, so there hasn’t been much time for blogging.

Wednesday we went on our 4th grade field trip to the state capitol building in Austin, TX!

I don’t know why I chose a night shot, but it is a lovely picture.

It was a truly fun experience! My class was great (we left the difficult one at school…) and the weather was beautiful.

I had a group of 6 boys to keep up with.  Here is one of my favorite quotes from the day.

Boy 1: Wow, look at all that paperwork! (They were looking in an office window)

Boy 2: Yeah, I never want to work at a place like this. I’d always have lots of work to do.

Me: Umm, no matter where you work you’ll probably always have lots of work to do.

Boy 2: Oh

Me: Laughing

 

One interesting part of our capitol tour included a joke about an early Texas governor named Jim Hogg who named his daughter….wait for it

IMA HOGG

Poor Ima.  She looks quite lovely actually…A bit sad though.  I’d be sad too if every 45 minutes, Monday-Friday some 20 year old Austin political wanna be gave a tour and made a joke about my name.

Anyways.

What the tour guide failed to mention was that Ima was quite the philanthropist and art collector and did many wonderful things in Texas (I had to google her of course).  She also failed to mention that legend formed she had a sister named Ura and that a Kansas City newspaper added a 3rd fictional sister named Hoosa.  LOL    Apparently she only had 3 brothers.

So my friends, let this be a lesson to you when naming your children or choosing a spouse. Names do matter.

 

Red Hot

Sunday, April 1st, 2012

That would be my RED neck, and my debit card.

Friday we had a mock cattle drive at school.  This was a fun reward for the kids after two days of state torture testing.

Each student was assigned a role (point man, wrangler, cook, flank) and received an egg in a bag to represent their cow.

We used eggs so they could see how difficult it was to travel with a herd of cattle and keep them safe.  The team had to “drive” the cattle by keeping them safe on the blanket as they traveled around school.

My students are so smart their brains are glowing.

OMG Shahs of Sunset commercial just came on and I can’t focus.

 

OK, so we had a TON of fun. We took our cattle into each pod and as the Trail Boss I would read scenario cards where they either lost or gained cattle.

One fun (yet loud) part of the drive was that rustlers could come and steal your cattle.  Several teachers from other grade levels were in charge of doing this . It got out of hand. My kids squealed like 5 year olds they were so scared.

After our cattle drive, we went outside to pet horses another teacher brought. They were beautiful.   We also had stick pony races, steer head roping, and saddle relays where they had to saddle a saw horse.  It was a great day.

When we returned to our classroom from the horse fun, we found this note on the board.

I feel like this is something you might read on a fertility blog instead. lol sorry. random.

 

Unfortunately, in my rush to get to work, I forgot sunscreen.

Yes, I have a giraffe neck. With zebra stripes.

My forehead also burned. :(

To make things worse, I had an appointment to get my eyebrows waxed after school at the fancy spa. :( Yes, the place full of  beautiful Alamo Heights rich lady skin.   OH and I smelled like a horse.

The lady sort of scolded me and told me to always carry sunscreen in my purse.  Then she put some miracle stuff on my face and it felt better. Then she scolded me some more.

In my efforts to prevent any further sun damage, I went crazy shopping.

Nike hat for running

and these cute hats from Target (I plan to leave one at school)

Next I found some sunscreen to order from Supergoop (A San Antonio-based company!)OH, and I may or may not have purchased one of these as an early birthday present to myself:

It is April people. My birth month! I am going to be 30. crap.

 

 

My First 5K+

Sunday, March 25th, 2012

I DID IT!

I wogged 3.5 miles yesterday (the course was actually a bit longer than a 5K…sheesh!) in 44 minutes.

One minute under my goal time. (whew)

While I’ve been informed that this is more like a walking pace…I really did jog most of it! Seriously!

It was a fabulous weekend.

My TeacherBarbie Buddy M&M and I headed to Austin Friday after school.  I played the Rocky theme song for her as we got ready to leave.

 This would be my theme song for the race…more on that later.

You see, I was a nervous wreck.  A mishap with some Mucinex D and a lack of antihistamines (Who knew it didn’t do the same thing as Claritin D…STUPID STUPID STUPID) had me so congested I could barely eat for lack of air.

This is also part of my new weight loss plan. Can’t keep yourself from eating pizza? Just forget to take your Claritin, and you won’t be able to breathe long enough to chew that delicious crust.

SO yeah, I couldn’t breathe, and I was supposed to “run” three miles. Like I always say, excuses are like cracks, everyone has one…so I still had to do this. I was committed.

We were supposed to meet M&Ms friends at 6 to go pick up race packets.

Then this happened:

I hate you I35

Thanks to this little traffic jam, I listened to NPR for about an hour straight.  I feel so informed.

Did you guys hear about the people who played the Borat version of Kazakhstan’s anthem?  That was my favorite piece of news.

Then we got lost due to a GPS typo we both made!

Fortunately, our kind friends picked up our racing packets for us, and we met at this cute restaurant.

This is the part where I couldn’t breathe well enough to eat.

After dinner, we went to M&M’s bff house to sleep.

Let me just throw in a side note- I did not know her friends, so they were absolutely the kindest people to let a weird, sick teacher into their home. THANK YOU!

I slept like a baby (thanks to my relaxation app on my iPhone…seriously the sound of urban rain and wind knocks me out!).

Saturday morning we were up at 7am ready to run! I could breathe! (See…God answers even stupid prayers)

I choked down a banana and almond butter, while praying I could finish.

We arrived at the Cedar Park center just in time.  The little kids were just finishing the Daisy Dash (1 mile run).

I kicked myself for not borrowing a kid to just do the Daisy Dash.

With a timer strapped around my ankle,  I lined up at the back of the pack…like waaayyyyy at the back.

I did not want to get in the way of any dads in little shorts.

Those guys are serious about their thin mint sprint.

I scoped out my competition for last place.

There were a couple of people with strollers I could probably beat (kids get heavy after 2 miles right?), and the two ladies who were obviously less prepared than myself (I’ll leave it at that).

I had a chance of NOT coming in last!

I blew my nose one last time, and we were off!  I was feeling good! Everything was going to be ok.

Except my iPhone didn’t get the message.  It was somehow set to shake and shuffle which meant every few steps it would switch songs.  Talk about annoying.

Then there was the running grandpa.  He was jogging in khaki shorts and a belt!

Picture the grandpa version of this.

“Surely I could beat this guy,” I mistakenly thought to myself right before he kicked it up a notch and took off at full speed.

And then there was a little girl, who earned the nickname Goldilocks from one of the other racers.

Goldilocks looked like she was about 7.  She was running by herself. (I later figured out her dad had went ahead and turned around to rejoin her after he finished)

This kid would run full speed ahead of me for about 20 seconds, and then she would walk.  Just about the time I would catch up to her, she would take off sprinting again.  I did not want Goldilocks to beat me. Thankfully her 7 year old shenanigans slowed her down at about the 3 mile mark. I must admit that she was as cute as a button. I kept telling her she was doing a good job…then she would take off sprinting again!

There was also the Hot Dad runner.

Nothing is more motivating than not trying to look fat and sweaty next to hot dad runner.

Ok, this post is turning into a marathon.

Needless to say I was highly entertained during the 5K.  I picked a person to try to keep in my sights (M&M’s bff’s mom), and that was my goal. If I could follow her, I would make it in time. Guess what! She won her age division! Woot Woot Mrs. Keller! If I were over 60 I would have come in 2nd place in my age division! I was almost a silver medal winner!

I’m pretty pumped to meet this lady! She wants to run with me at The Pearl!  :)

I was almost to the end when the dizzies hit me. I walked for about 10 seconds and then told myself to at least make it look like I’m jogging to the end.

As I crossed the finish line, they called my name! I threw up the Pistols Firing Guns in hopes of that making it into the race photos.

Obviously this isn't me...I would never wear such a large bow on my head.

It felt great and I admit I may be hooked.

Just think what I could do if I actually finish the 5k training program I started! lol

Here was my real photo:

I’m a jolly green giant!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yeah I know. I obviously have had my fair share of Girl Scout Cookies lately. Those hips don’t lie remember!

Hopefully the next few race photos will look closer to this:

OK, so I have a better chance of looking that blonde than that thin but you get the idea. 😉

Thank you very much M&M for motivating me to get off my booty.  You are a great friend!

My face is SO red…and that hair!?!

Which reminds me of one of my favorite pins on Pinterest

HAHAHHA

 

SO tomorrow I’m wearing my racing shirt with pride.  I can’t wait to sign up for my next one (which I’m pretty sure will be on April 28th! MY THIRTIETH BIRTHDAY! That is right people. I’m about to turn 30) OMG.

What challenge are you working on?

 

Teacher Barbie: Spring Break Edition

Thursday, March 1st, 2012

Teacher Barbies, I have sad news.

I have a virus. It is called Spring Breakitis. That’s right people. It is almost SPRING BREAK!

This is a serious condition from which I might not recover.

This is the time of year when testing is king, children get mean, and I’m not looking so lean.

You know Spring Breakitis has struck when:

You eat Frosted Mini Wheats for dinner every night and tell the boyfriend, “I’ll go grocery shopping over spring break.”

You realize it is time to start taking home the 6 coffee cups that you’ve accumulated in your desk.

You text your friends only to say you are too tired to talk, and call me in two weeks.

You leave the laundry in a pile…you can wash it all over spring break.

You start shoving all that ungraded work in the recycling bin.

You say things like, “I know I have this horrible headache and my face is twitching, but I’ll go to the doctor over spring break.”

You answer ever child’s question with, “You do whatever you think you need to do.”

You start playing with silly putty to keep from going Abby Lee on someone!

 

As you can see, I’m in need of a Teacher Barbie Break

I’m thinking Spring Break Barbie…Cabo anyone?

or Spa Day Barbie…I’ve been thinking of ditching the Katy Perry hair and going blonde again!

Though I’ll probably just end up being Couch Potato Barbie

Time to watch The Trashlorette and catch up on Revenge ladies!!! (BTW is this Barbie wearing Crocs?!?)

Which means I should probably be a Trashlorette Barbie

“We have such a great connection, the couch and I.”

 

Do you have any spring break plans or spring break ideas!?

Other than desperately trying to catch up on my 5K training, I will probably spend at least two days playing with my blog layout after I learned so many tricks on Blogelina (a cool name!).  That must make me Tech Barbie.

 

Tuesday Confessions: Dirty Job

Tuesday, February 28th, 2012

I have a confession to make. I have a newly discovered hidden talent.

I am a world champion Snot Dodger.

Yes this is gross, but this is a talent that should not go unnoticed. Especially because this is a pending Winter Olympics 2023 event.

I successfully dodged major snot not once but THREE times today.

Round 1:  The Sneaky Sneezer

Lil Susie comes up to me with a “question” but only managed to sneeze in my face. Luckily I was armed with a notebook and blocked my face asap.

Round 2: Allergy Salute

My mother coined this term. This is when the snotty kid continually rubs their nasty nose and then touches everything in sight.  Lil Johnny performed the allergy salute and then opened the door to go to the restroom. Moments later I ALMOST touched the door knob, but quickly grabbed a tissue and used that to protect my hand! Whew. Dodged another bullet.

Round 3: The ULTIMATE TEST (and the grossest)

While sitting at my guided reading table (shaped like a U) a little boy sneezed. In slow motion, the largest ball of **@#$@ came flying out of his nose.  I screamed like a scared little girl, but also managed to jump out of the way. Needless to say I handed him a lysol wipe. He can do his own dirty work.

So you see, I have a unique skill that is highly necessary for such a Dirty Job.  I’m sorry if I’ve spoiled your dinner from reading this. It was just something I had to get off my nose chest.   ick.

 

What odd skill does your job require?

 

 

Currently (mid)February and a Bang-n Giveaway

Saturday, February 18th, 2012

I’m a little late to the Currently in February Party at Oh Boy Fourth Grade, but I love doing it anyways!

 

There are lots of reasons why I love Farley at Oh Boy Fourth Grade.

1) She reads my blog. LOL

2) She teaches at one of the sweetest schools I’ve every worked at.

3) She makes awesome printable projects for her kiddos that you can find here.

4) She is super stylish

5) She has BANGS!!!!!

Which is why she is hosting a Bang-n giveaway on her blog!

Check it out! She has a mustache stamp very similar to my valentine stamp! Awesome!